Okay, I’m not 30. You know I am 31. But the former sounded better, so style won out over honesty.
And while I’ve probably had my fair share of toddler-like meltdowns, I didn’t act like one yesterday.
Instead, I felt like one.
I wish I could report that I played, napped, and watched garbage trucks on YouTube reliving my year as a two year old. Sadly, though, this wasn’t the case. I would have preferred Care Bears over garbage trucks.
Seriously, I simply had one of those days. You know the type I’m talking about, or I’ll assume you do. My Tuesday was one where I felt like I was operating in the dark, trying to make sense of my world. I attempted to ask questions or make connections to help clarify things. My communications failed miserably. In my head my words made perfect sense and I thought I was speaking in relatable terms, but it all came out of my mouth in an inarticulate jumble. Those trying to understand seemed frustrated or let down. And I ultimately felt the same, along with confused and defeated.
In summary, it was like a day at a law firm. A familiar feeling. One where I felt disappointed in myself for how things transpired, but also one where I felt confident that I could get back on track the next day. So, all in all, a blip I could repair.
Then, on my drive home when I continued to ruminate on what I could’ve done better in the situation, I surprisingly started crying. The light bulb went off. I (finally) registered understood this is how my toddler son probably feels on a daily basis. He’s struggling with his burgeoning independence and so are we. I can’t say we’ve been the most patient, level-headed parents the last few weeks, as most mundane tasks have resulted in waterworks. And it’s because he’s rightfully feeling confused and misunderstood…thankfully I finally saw the obvious.
I pulled into my driveway with empathy and openness for my little one.
This refresher lesson was needed and appreciated.
~ The Other Sarah