Living Abroad With Kids: Would You Do It?
Have you dreamt of packing your bags and moving your family to another country? Have you acted on it? I’d love to know.
Since returning from France—and perhaps influenced by my constant consumption of HGTV’s House Hunters International—living as an expat someplace, somewhere has been on my mind. I could easily see my family of three enjoying gelato in one of the many parks in our adopted Parisian neighborhood of the Marais. Shopping for fruit in the markets of Thailand. Or truly learning to speak Spanish once and for all in Argentina.
Of course, living in a foreign country would provide a richer cultural experience than my imagined snapshots. It would inspire us to be more adaptable, empathic, open-minded, and adventurous people—I love the idea that we’d learn to see things through a new light. It would promote multilingualism and teach my children to be true global citizens. And it would hopefully encourage us to connect as a family on simpler, but deeper level (I imagine that the rewards and challenges of moving abroad would solidify family bonds in way that we often deny ourselves in the U.S. due to prioritizing work whether by choice or circumstance).
In theory, starting fresh in foreign place sounds romantic. But in reality, I’m sure it’s easier said than done…although Gabrielle Blair and her sister Jordan Ferney made it look natural and effortless. Could you leave your network of family and friends? How would you secure work? What would you do for your children’s schooling? At what age would it be best for kids to live in another country? How long? The questions and what ifs are endless because it’s a hard decision to walk away from what you know in exchange for the possibility of a grand adventure.
While my friends and I have each promised to buy a vacation home in a different locale so we can swap and share (a bucket list goal), this definitely won’t materialize immediately. So if I wanted to move to Paris tomorrow, I would have to quit my job, sell my house, use those monies to find a new home, and cross my fingers that I could land some freelance gigs. Not to mention, I’d have to say goodbye to the family who regularly cares for the Little Dude. And that is priceless. But so is the experience of living outside the United States.
I don’t know when, where, or how this is going to happen. Someday…
Until then, we'd love to hear from you. What would entice you to move to a different country?
~ The Other Sarah
6 Comments
Reader Comments (6)
I have plans to parlay my experience teaching Business Law into a semester abroad teaching in India or China perhaps. Ever since a close friend mentioned it as a possibility,I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. Everyone thinks I'm crazy...but of course they said the same thing about moving to Paducah.
We have lived with our son in Brazil, the US, and now India. It is awesome sometimes and it sucks sometimes. One of the things that I don't think most people realize is that your family/personal problems won't disappear when you move abroad - they might actually amplify since you are so dependent on each other. Communication is a must!
It is also a major adjustment when you move to a new place so different from what you are used to. That could be because you don't speak the language - I am conversant in Portuguese thanks to our time in Brazil, which was a very painful and rewarding experience! Or because local customs are so different compared to what you are used to - in India many people won't say 'no' to a request even if they have no intention of following through. The honeymoon phase could be replaced by feelings of disappointment and/or disgust. But, it is all a learning experience if you work at it and it can be very rewarding for you and your family.
Most people we meet who live abroad are teachers, volunteers (including Peace Corps), work for the US govt, or work with a company with offices outside of the US. That said, I would highly recommend it to anyone who has the means and will to do so. We love it. :o)
Janelle, I had no idea! How fascinating! I'm sure you are right about it not being all roses. I've travelled enough to know the "why can't you do things like AMERICANS!?!" is inevitable. ;) - SSH
Would I? Could I? In fact, I do. I've just moved to Indonesia with my 2 year-old (who was born in Japan, BTW), and I can tell you that as long as you keep an open mind, and don't expect things to be like they are at home, you'll be fine. You really do have to be open to differences, though. Not just different customs, but different standards of medical care, different notions of cleanliness, even different meanings of the word "no" (as mentioned by the above commentor. If you are a person who is constantly worried about germs, or really concerned about things being done "the right way", then you'd find living abroad hard. But if you're quite "go with the flow", you'll adapt really well. Though, as I said, the key is to expect nothing to be like it is at home.
The military has given me an interesting look at life in other countries. While I have not had the opportunity to live abroad during my husband's career, most of my friends who've lived abroad have LOVED it. I have MANY friends who live/have lived/plan to live in Germany, Japan, Italy, Korea, Singapore, Guam (OK, not technically a foreign country), the UK and many more.
Even those who weren't very excited about moving to whatever country it was, loved the opportunity to branch out and experience a foreign culture. One caveat they all added, however, was that living in US military quarters was much less of a cultural immersion experience than living in local housing. Even when those local housing options were in neighborhoods populated largely by other American military.
I consider the lost opportunity of living abroad on the nation's dime to be one of the downsides of separation from the military. Of course no more deployments are a HUGE plus! Our close friends who lived in Northern Japan for the last three years, would gladly have stayed, they enjoyed Japanese culture so much. The only thing my friend really missed was pasta!
I am for you thy you missed the chance but not for me! I like you close ;)